Cashiers that give you change on top of the receipt

receipt

I’m finished at the checkout. I’ve handed over my notes; bags are packed and in one hand and I’m waiting to claim my change with the other. The checkout operator has already scooped up the coinage ­– they could give it to me there and then – but no, they decide to wait for the receipt to finish printing. In the time it’s taking for that piece of paper to be spat out I could be sequesting those pieces of silver about my person with no fuss whatsoever. But no, the bastard at the till wants to streamline our final moments together into one single interaction. I look on helplessly as the inevitable comes…

And sure enough, he plants everything into my outstretched hand in one go; receipt at the bottom, change on top.

My other hand is weighed down with shopping so I’m limited in the choices available to deal with this mixture of paper and metal both quickly and efficiently. I didn’t buy clothes or a gift for my mum, so proof of purchase is not necessary, but I can’t isolate the receipt for binning because it’s buried under my change. And I’m not going to drop the whole lot into the carrier bag ­– that would be foolhardy.

I could stuff the whole lot into my jeans, but the pockets are tight ­– when I attempt to remove the receipt later, there’s a real risk that some of my change will come flying out of my pocket at the same time. I’ve lost pound coins doing this. It’s annoying.

Alternatively, I can try to deposit just the change into my pocket, leaving the receipt in my hand for disposal. But to do this I would need to open my hand before it enters my pocket, and the reduced friction caused by the underlying receipt means the change would begin sliding all over the place rather than finding purchase in my clammy palm. The chances of the coins missing the target and scattering over the floor in front of everyone in the supermarket are just too ruddy high!

I’m paralysed, caught between a rock and a hard place, and it’s all your fault cashier-boy. I don’t know what I did to make you hate me so much, but you’ve just ensured that the feeling is very much mutual. Next time give me the change first. Or just pop the receipt in the bag. Thanks. (Cretin.)

10 comments

  1. It’s as if I am reading a blog made by myself from an alternate reality. It’s really quite spooky.

  2. or, you could politely hold out your hand for said change and watch as the gum-chewing checkout muppet plonks your change unceremoniously on the counter in front of you… gee, thanks…

  3. roberto

    I thought I was the only one. This has bothered me for years, it must be taught to them as proper cashier etiquette or something. I’ve lost bills stuffing that unwieldy mess into my pockets while trying to move along as not to delay the queue behind me.

  4. Sco

    Hold out two hands.

  5. If this is the worst thing that you’ve got to worry about, then be fucking grateful. A lot of us are dealing with far worse issues, and reading things like this just makes me really angry.

    • AuntPrudence

      If reading about things like this makes you really angry then you better be damn fucking greatful, because many of us are dealing with even worse stuff, and we get really angry when we read about you getting really angry about reading things like this.

      Then again, the irritation I felt upon reading your comment did help to distract me somewhat from my overwhelming grief. Perhaps there is a lesson to be learnt here!

  6. Chuck

    Get angry who ever you are. I find it incredibly stupid that these new punk cashiers can’t figure out how unprofessional they are piling your money on that slip. They are so stupid that you can’t even explain to them the good reasons for doing it the right way. And then who are their mangers? Who that’s right. More stupid punks.

  7. Don Sirlion

    Sure the cashier can cater to your stupid ass by doing it some other SLOWER way, but most of the time this is the quickest way for both parties. If you weren’t an idiot you might even anticipate what is about to happen and not pick up the crap you bought until you put YOUR change away.

    • Chuck

      The only dumb asses are the people like you that don’t understand the correct way which is NO SLOWER and that is to NOT put change on top of the slip or paper money where it can slide off. The cashier’s job IS to cater to the customers in the most convenient way which was established decades ago and that is to put the change at the bottom of your hand and then the paper money on top of that but no damn slip until the money is put away. Most men do not have room in their billfolds for slips so that receipt has no business being in their hand until the money is put away. If the receipt is handed separately and if the customer wants to he can clutter up his billfold with receipts. Of course, picking up the items you bought should not be done until the money is put away. As one hand is holding your billfold the other hand should NOT have to sort that slip out of the money nor try to pour the coins off the paper or paper money into your pocket only to miss causing them to fall to the floor. Since too many managers are young punks themselves they don’t seem to know to instruct the other workers the right way. My store employees are not allowed to do it any other way and they are also not allowed to put a larger bill into the register until the transaction is done. Don’t bury the proof of what bill is handed you by sticking it in the drawer right away.

  8. My dear followers (and people that have come across this blog accidentally)…

    As the majority of you are no doubt aware, this blog is not meant to be taken too seriously, and despite my apparent fury, my tongue is planted firmly in my cheek.

    Please don’t let my missives upset you too much. And indeed, don’t let other people’s angry responses to my entries bother you either.

    It’s just a bit of fun!

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